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(66) The Helmer’s didn’t communicate feeling through their relationship nor
did they communicate love. Torvald did give Nora gifts of money but he did not
give her the respect and devotion she, as well as any wife, needs. Torvald did
love the idea of having a wife, but he did not sincerely love Nora. Yet Nora did
believe that he loved her, and showed through her feelings of expectance of
Torvald to sacrifice himself, when she would be accused of her crime. Yet, when
she discovered that Torvald really didn’t love her she stated, “You have never
love me. You have only thought it to be pleasant to be in love with me” (66).
She then knew that he only viewed her as a problem, and that her marriage was
meaningless. “You have destroyed all of my happiness. You have ruined all my
future. It is horrible…I must sink to such miserable depths because of a
thoughtless woman!” (62). The ending of Nora and Torvald’s marriage was
inevitable. A true couple cannot connect when love and communication are absent,
and without these vital necessities a marriage is empty. Nora and Torvald had to
learn this before they could commit themselves to any human being. Nora had to
understand that she could not rely on Torvald for her identity the rest of her
life, and Torvald too had to understand that Nora was a person and he had to
treat her as an equal. At first he only viewed Nora as a fulfillment for his
need for a wife, but when she left he finally realized that he really did need
her. “Empty! She is gone. The most wonderful thing of all” (72). Even though
their marriage was shattered, both Torvald and Nora had to experience what they
did to then grow and become truly independent themselves. If they were sincere
about making their marriage work the two had to know who they were, before they
could give themselves over to another person. Because they had not done this,
Nora knew that she had “been living together with a strange man and had borne
him three children” (70). Marriage is when two people become one, and if those
two do not have any identity to bring to that marriage, then they do not
successfully unite to make one.
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